You know how, sometimes, you are out of town and decide to get something for dinner that costs more than $10, but still have plans to take it back to your hotel to eat on your bed during Tori and Dean, Home Sweet Hollywood.
And sometimes, you try to be healthy and order the salad and even order it with portabellas instead of chicken because mmmm well seasoned grilled portabellas.
And sometimes there is no mentioned of the hated tomato on the menu, so you, as any fool would, orders away willy nilly making sure to request the homemade blue cheese on the side.
So you walk out to your car with salad in the bag and glance at it as you drive off only to realize that some ass munch has decided that diced tomatoes go with a walnut, blue cheese and portabella salad. Diced. Not chopped, DICED. So they are small enough that you have gotten their juices on their leafy friends nearby. And practically impossible to get every single one out of the salad.
And let’s not forget to mention the portabella that you were so excited to have. The overcooked, flacid looking brown slugs tossed on top of the salad.
Good thing McDonald’s vanilla cones are tasty.